Friday, April 30, 2010
I just finished a piece of writing that for a while I thought might derail me. In the big scheme of things, it really doesn't matter. Only one person other than me will ever read it, and in the end it was written only because it had to be to sustain an important professional relationship. But for a while there, every time I opened the document, or read anything related to it, or attempted to work on it, I felt utterly paralyzed, inadequate and incapable. I don't really understand why it made me feel that way. But I wanted to put it out there because I want to be able to return to this in the future when I encounter students who seem to me to be unaccountably stuck. It was important for me to push through and do this, even if the results are rather meaningless, because it proved to me that I am capable of doing these types of things. It will be important for me to push my students to do what they may feel paralyzed by. But I also hope I manage to maintain at least some empathy.